Christmas is over. New Years is over. I find this to be incredibly depressing. Dave and I had a wonderful Christmas and a very relaxing few days in Mesquite with my family. Oh how I wish I was in the hot tub again....right now...sigh. The break from school was great. I did exactly what I wanted to do...TRY my best to NOT stress about the upcoming semester. I actually feel like I did a really good job. (Dave would disagree, I'm sure). But really. I felt great about the Spring 2012 semester. I was excited. Student teaching...my LAST semester. And then, it actually came, and to be completely honest, I'm struggling.
Today was my first day of student teaching and so I realize that I'm feeling very overwhelmed simply because of the fact that everything is "new" again. I know I'll get into a schedule and it will eventually be over and I'll look back and laugh at my stress. But today, right now, it's all very fresh and exhausting. In case you didn't know, I HATE change. It's really one of my biggest fears. (Which is NOT a good fear to have at this point in my life). I feel like my life just underwent a complete 180 and it's seriously taking its toll. (One of my goals for this year is to learn to accept change and look forward to it, rather than fear it. We'll see how that goes. I anticipate A LOT of change for this year so I better start now!)
Basically, I just needed to get my thoughts out because it makes me feel better. It's funny. I knew that this was going to happen, I'm just embarrassed that it happened so quickly. I don't usually go through my "breaking point" until at least halfway through the semester. I made it two days....HA.
My house is a mess, the dishes need to be done, the laundry washed and folded...AND, our Christmas tree is still up (and will most likely stay up until I graduate....Dave and I have this whole thing going...don't ask). But, I've decided that all that matters right now is that I stay focused and committed to my teaching and my job. Yeah...did I mention that I'm teaching 40 hours a week (for free mind you) as well as continuing to work??? I shouldn't complain because as mentioned previously, being able to continue working while I student teach has been the biggest blessing for Dave and I. We need it and are very grateful. I think I just get overwhelmed sometimes.
SO, to end this incredibly long rant, what I'd really like to know is....HOW do you all do it? I know I'm not the only busy person out there. I need some organization tips people. I'm being completely serious. Also, any tips on getting a good night's sleep? (I'm fairly certain that 99.9% of my frustrations today stem from the fact that I'm running on little to no sleep).
I feel better. If you actually read all that, congrats to you. Now, I'm going to go to bed, wake up tomorrow, and impress the crap out of my principal and cooperating teacher. Cuz I'm Ashley Bland, and that's how I do!*
*grammar and spelling errors are on purpose for those who were shocked by that last sentence. ;) I really CAN teach people. :)
Oh man Ash... I feel the same way. You are doing so much more than me and I feel overwhelmed. The first 2 days of school have already freaked me out! I also haven't slept well for weeks it seems. I woke up on Monday at 4 and didn't fall back asleep. Totally sucks. Hopefully with a little positive attitude, hard work and loads of sarcasm... we will make it through.:) Love ya!
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